From the beginning of my blogging experience, I knew there would be a few topics I never wanted to write about. A few words that I never wanted to see flash across this screen. And love was one of those. Never write about love. It was one of the cardinal rules I gave myself when I started this. You cannot write about love. About being loved. About loving others. None of it. You leave love out of it. You don’t define it. You don’t explain it. You don’t write about it. End of story.
Love is a word that has many definitions. Each person has their own take on what love is and how you love and who you love. Because of that, I knew it was an area I never wanted to touch. I never felt I could do justice with my words to add any value to love.
And there began Blogging Rule #28: Do not write about love.
I should begin by saying I am wrong all the time. Well, maybe not all the time. But there are some weeks where everything you thought you knew or understood or believed were right. When in actuality… Well, they are just wrong. Wrong in a good way. In a humbling way. In a way that brings laughter to yourself because truthfully that is the only way to handle it. That is exactly how these last two weeks have felt to me. I’ve been wrong. I’ve laughed. I’ve been humbled. And it is okay.
The truth is I am wrong sometimes. I get it wrong some days. And, I didn’t want to write that either. I’ve had a hard time writing these last few days because I didn’t want to put the words down on paper. I didn’t want to shatter the misconception of my perfectionism.
I’m not sure if it is me or the world, but somedays you just feel like you have so many rules. I don’t know how they get there sometimes. Or who actually creates them. But they exist. As soon as I find myself caught in that place, I usually try to find a way out. I try to overcome my battle of being perfect and following every rule.
I’m not a fan of that word by the way. Perfect. It is a word that wipes the smile off my face and brings a strong tightness in my chest. It is so easily misused. And it puts an immediate pressure on yourself that had nobody mentioned the word, that pressure would have never existed. Perfect makes me feel like I need to compare. Like comparison will actually lead me to something important in my life. When I know deep down, it never will.
Perfect. Comparison. Those are topics for another day. Other moments. Back to my reason for writing today. You want to know the reason why Blogging Rule #28 would never work. Because love is an action that is present every day of our lives. It always there. Every day. In every action. In every moment. With all types of people. Family. Friends. Strangers. It is there. It is always there. It is choice that you make every day to do. If I spend my days writing about my experiences, then love has to be there. It has to be written about. It has to be a part of the story.
I never wanted to put my definition out there because it has changed throughout my years. It grows and adapts the more I live. The more I learn about life. Today my definition is simple. Love every day. Every place. Every person. In ways that they enjoy. In ways that they want. In ways that think less of you and more of them. In kind words. In helpful gestures. In small actions. In giving of your time and resources.
Some days will consist only of you giving every part of your heart and loving. You may wonder if you will ever see love returned sometimes. I can guarantee this. You will. It may not be that same day. Or that same week. Or the way you expect it. But at some point you will see it.
You will see it returned to you in some of the sweetest gestures that take you by surprise. You will see it in people that you never thought would give you what you needed. You will see it in some the simplest of actions when the world feels as though it is weighing heavy on you and one simple action will help relieve that weight. I promise you will see it. And the moment you see it come back to you, you will immediately want to turn around and share it with as many people as you can. You will want to take the good that someone did for you and do the same for others. Or at least that is what I hope you see.
The lessons I’ve learned these last few days. They are very simple. It is okay to break the rules sometimes and to admit when you completely have it wrong and to write about it. And the best medicine to handle these situations: a notebook and laughter.